can everyday be a weekend? can i get married to be tai-tai? got chauffeur got maid, do nothing but shopping watch tv and sleeping?

why i so ambitionless all of a sudden? where has my courage run away to?

amitabha,amen. ql ask me pray to pass.. haha

mummy is right, i cant afford to lose. i dont like the feeling of losing out, when i know i am definitely capable of victory. but my willpower and heart are weak. sigh.

feel like cursing, but what good can it do, except to tarnish my already non-existent image? but the alternative is to cry... in the middle of the night, when helplessness and despair overwhelms me.